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In Saudi Arabia’s rigid past, religious police once swooped down on rose sellers and anyone peddling red paraphernalia around Valentine’s Day, but now a more open — albeit risky — dating culture is taking root. Pursuing relationships outside of marriage in the conservative Islamic kingdom once amounted to a death wish, and would-be Romeos resorted to pressing phone numbers up against their car window in hope of making contact with women. Now a sweeping liberalization drive — which has rendered the religious police toothless and allowed gender mixing like never before — has made it easier for young couples to meet in cafes and restaurants.
Well-heeled millennials also hunt for romantic liaisons via Twitter and Snapchat, and apps such as Swarm — designed to log places the user visits but often repurposed to look for dates. Pre-marital relationships remain a cultural minefield though in a country steeped in Islamic tradition and where matchmaking is typically overseen by family elders, forcing couples to keep unsanctioned romance under wraps.
Covert dating operations illustrate how Saudi Arabia’s mainly young population is often compelled to lead dual lives in the pursuit of social liberties that may outstrip the kingdom’s capacity for change. Samirah, a year-old finance executive in the Saudi capital, felt a flutter of nerves when her boyfriend’s mother stumbled upon a handwritten birthday card and gift she gave him — and that risked her own family finding out.
In a society where family honor is often tied to female chastity, the revelation would have provoked fury from her family and jeopardized their months-long courtship that began through common friends. Her boyfriend managed to deflect his mother, but the scare prompted the young couple yearning for more freedom to plan a forbidden rendezvous — a long weekend in Dubai disguised as a business trip.
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Much of Waleed’s “love relationship” with his girlfriend has taken place online. The pair finally met in person in Egypt, where gender mixing is.
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